Comedian Jackie Vernon is henpecked Donald, a construction worker who cannot get a decent bologna sandwich from his self-deluded chef wife May (Claire Ginsberg). He wants simple food, but May punishes him with gastronomical cuisine that she consistently mispronounces. She orders a giant microwave the size of a regular oven, and waits for Donald- who gets drunk, goes home, and murders May. He dismembers her body and puts her in the freezer. As he watches a television show about a criminal eating the evidence, he takes a bite out of some May meat. He starts taking May to work for meals, telling everyone they broke up. His friends try his lunch, and they want more, too. Donald begins hunting for more "lunches" via hookers and prostitutes. Plot lacking in details? The film is a mere seventy five minutes long.
While this might sound kind of silly and fun, believe me, it is not. There is just one funny joke here: a prostitute's (Lou Ann Webber) name is Dee Dee Dee, because her mother stuttered. Other than that, the film serves as a platform for Vernon's stand up act: jokes are set up, punchlines are delivered, and the cast pauses for all the audience's imagined laughter to subside. Vernon and the rest of the cast are pretty bad. There is plenty of nudity, but the gore effects are very weak. I think they used the same prosthetic for all the females, even though it looks like a man's hand. Donald and May's domestic decor is hideously funny. "Microwave Massacre" is a great title but the movie does not live up to its potential. One can hope for a vulgar and classless remake, but in the meantime, I don't recommend this.
