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Peter Parker (Nicholas Hammond) is an earnest photographer for editor J. Jonah Jameson (Robert F. Simon). The plot is way too complicated for a two-part episode of a network television series: Min Lo Chan (Benson Fong) arrives in New York City from Hong Kong. He is to become a minister in the Chinese government, and villain Zeider (Richard Erdman) wants him dead so he could get a steel mill contract. Min, on the other hand, is up on charges of selling Chinese military secrets to some U.S. Marines in WWII. Min wants to clear his name, and needs to find the three Marines in order to have them tell their side of the story. Min is good friends with Jameson, so he goes to the cranky editor for help. Min drags his poor niece Emily (Rosalind Chao) along as Parker and Min hunt for the Marines, and Spider-Man conveniently pops up to save the day. The last half of the film is shot on location in Hong Kong, as we Americans offend the Far East with cheesy action sequences.
I really tried to get into this. Ted Danson pops up in one scene, as the most unconvincing Marine Corps officer ever filmed. I thought it was funny that the first episode- I mean, the first half of the film- took place in New York City, film makers obviously shot some of this in Southern California. Hammond is good as Parker, but the costumed Spider-Man is awful. However, this bored me. No one could figure out Parker is Spider-Man, until one scene where Emily unmasks him (after he gets hurt AGAIN), and that scene is glossed over. The film makers try to take advantage of Hong Kong locales, but the story is convoluted and lame, it is a shame they went through the money and effort. The direction is standard. The script is jumpy because it is two hour-long episodes edited together. When Spider-Man climbs a building, you can see rope and machines pulling him up. Spidey gets shot, twice!, but in each arm. The whole thing is laughable- Parker goes "undercover" by disguising himself as a Chinese stereotype, right down to dark pajamas and a straw hat.
This might find new life thanks to all the "Spider-Man" films constantly coming out, but do yourself a favor and go to the theater instead. Also known as "The Amazing Spider-Man"'s episode's title, "The Chinese Web."
Stats:
(1979) 92 min. (1/10)
-Directed by Don McDougall
-Written by Lionel E. Siegel
-Cast: Nicholas Hammond, Rosalind Chao, Robert F. Simon, Benson Fong, Richard Erdman, Ted Danson, George Cheung, Chip Fields, Ellen Bry, Hagan Beggs, John Milford, Anthony Charnota, Tony Clark
-(TV-PG)
-Media Viewed: VHS
