Zombie Night (2013)

*Get a physical copy of "Zombie Night" on Amazon here*
*Watch "Zombie Night" on Amazon Prime Video here*
*Get a physical copy of "Feast" (Unrated Edition) on Amazon here*
*Get a physical copy of "Feast II: Sloppy Seconds" (Unrated Edition) on Amazon here*

"Zombie Night" had a lot going for it- a name cast, an experienced genre director, and some very bloody special effects. Unfortunately, the film makers chose this script to shoot, and the film goes down in flames in the opening sixty seconds.

Patrick (Anthony Michael Hall) and his daughter Tracie (Rachel Fox) are on their way home to her boyfriend Perry (Daniel Ross Owens) and his stuffy family- dad Joseph (Alan Ruck), mom Karin (Jennifer Taylor), and little brother Nathan (Gibson Bobby Sjobeck). Patrick's wife Birdy (Daryl Hannah) and her blind mother Barbara (how did Shirley Jones get involved in this!?) are also waiting at home for Patrick and Tracie when all the dead rise up as zombies and wreak havoc. End of plot summary.

To say this film starts off quick would be an understatement. I watched this on physical media, and checked to see if I accidentally put a Part 2 disc in my player first (there was no Part 2 disc). As the opening credits are rolling, the zombies pop up and start attacking the cast. There is no back story about who these people are or how they're related, so I thought I might have to break out a flowchart and do some deducing- oh, Joseph and Patrick are neighbors- but try as I might, I couldn't care less about anyone's plight. As the film went through the motions, my mind wandered. The violence and blood are extreme, but so are the dumb decisions made by the victims. Some characters die and "turn," while some are bitten by zombies and seem fine? The cast are told that the zombies all...stop zombieing?...at daybreak, so they must make it through the night...for because reasons. Hey, Hall and Ruck appeared in John Hughes films back in the 1980's! Yawn, what is Shirley Jones doing in this, again? Speaking of horrors, what's with the yellow cinematography and terrible editing?

"Zombie Night" has a short running time, but feels like a two and a half hour movie stuck on replay. Brain dead, indeed.

Stats:
(2013) 90 min. (*) out of five stars
-Directed by John Gulager
-Screenplay by Keith Allan and Delondra Mesa, Story by Richard Schenkman
-Cast: Anthony Michael Hall, Daryl Hannah, Alan Ruck, Rachel Fox, Shirley Jones, Jennifer Taylor, Daniel Ross Owens, Gibson Bobby Sjobeck, Zoe Canner, Tia Robinson, Rogelio T. Ramos, Diane Ayala Goldner, Hayley Derryberry
-Unrated- Very strong physical violence, very strong gun violence, strong violence involving children, very strong gore, mild profanity, strong adult situations